Unity in Marriage

".... This asks you to think in a new way. Up till now we have assumed that there are only two beings in a marriage, the husband and the wife. In fact, there are three complete beings in a marriage -- you, your spouse, and the relationship between you, which both of you serve, which benefits each of you, but which is not exactly like either one of you. This relationship is itself very much like a living being -- like a baby born from you both. It has its own character.... This 'being', this living thing, this relationship which needs you both (the whole of each of you), but which is not you (it is not the two of you added together, because it is distinct from either one of you) -- that is your 'oneness'. Serving it, you both enact a harmony. You are co-laborers committed to the care of a single (third!) life between you. You are each a whole, unique, free creature of God. Yet you are one."

Walter Wangerin, Jr. As for Me and My House, Th. Nelson (1990).

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